“He’s so quiet in person; I can’t believe how much he writes online.”
“I never see the two of them talking in person, but they IM all the time.”
“It seems like some people are different online than they are face-to-face.”

If I had a nickle for everytime I heard someone say something like this, I could buy a venti peppermint mocha at Starbucks. Ever wonder why people seem different online? Janie B. Cheaney provided a compelling answer on page 47 of the Nov. 12 issue of World Magazine:

“Internet posting satisfies two primal urges: “I wish I could say that,” and “I wish I had said that.” Welcome to the internet: freedom from retaliation plus all the time you need to compose that clever comeback… Why do people say things to each other online that they would never say face to face?

“Perhaps because faces communicate hurt, anger and sorrow—all difficult emotions we try to avoid. To deal with someone “in person” means dealing with the whole package—voice, expression, body language—a formidable presence that promotes a respectful distance, at least until we get to know the person better. By contrast, an on-line forum is bloodless, abstract thought. Or so it appears.

“Yet, it’s “out of the heart [that] the mouth speaks,” and freed from the restraints of personal contact it can speak too freely, showing itself at times a storehouse of anger and contempt.”

Remember: if Luke 6:45 is true, and it’s out of the abundance of the heart that the fingers type, then the online you is the real you.

Ask your parents to help you evaluate what your online communication reveals about your heart.

Categories: five15 blog