I ran across this chapter 102 of John Piper’s A Godward Life, Part 1. The chapter is entitled “Teenage Resolutions In Honor Of Mom And Dad: What I Pray Our Teens Will Say.” In case you don’t have the book, I want to share most of the article with you here. As you read this, some might think to themselves: “This just isn’t realistic. Way over the top. Does he really expect this of teens.” The answer is that God’s grace can do this to teenagers. It’s not unrealistic or unreasonable.

Teens, sit down with your parents and go over this together. What commitments is God calling you to make to them and to God? It doesn’t have to be exactly this list; you may want to come up with your own. But you should remember that honoring your father and your mother (Ephesians 6:2-3) looks something like this.

Here we go:

This is my vision of what is possible in the power of Christ’s Spirit under the influence of God’s Word.

1. Resolved: I will obey your instructions and do what I know you expect of me, even when it is not mentioned. I will not force you into repeated reminders, which I sometimes call nagging.
2. Resolved: I will not grumble or complain when I do my chores but remember what a great thing it is to have a family, a home, clothes, food, running water, electric lights, and central heating in a world where millions of teenagers have none of these.
3. Resolved: When I think your demands are unfair, I will move to do them first, and after showing an obedient attitude, I will ask if we can talk. Then I will explain my side and try to understand yours.
4. Resolved: I will not stonewall you and give you the silent treatment, which I dislike when my friends to do me. If I am depressed and want to be left alone, I will say, “I’m sorry, I don’t feel like talking now. Can we talk later? I’m not mad. I just need to be alone.”
5. Resolved: When I do something wrong and let you down, I will apologize sincerely with words that you can hear. Something like, “Mom, I’m sorry I didn’t pick up the pile of clothes.”
6. Resolved: I will call you be affectionate family titles like “Mommy,” “Daddy,” “Mom,” or “Dad.” I won’t let other kids pressure me into calling you nothing or calling you something disrespectful as though true affection were embarrassing or childish.
7. Resolved: I will say thank you again and again for the ordinary things you do for me. I will not take them for granted as though you were my slave.
8. Resolved: I will talk about my feelings. Both the positive ones (like happiness, pity, excitement, and sympathy) and the negative ones (like anger, fear, grief, loneliness, and discouragement). I will remember that unshared feelings lead to estrangement, coldness, and even more lonliness and discouragement.
9. Resolved: I will laugh with the family and not at the family. I will especially laugh when my little brother or sister tells a simple joke with expectant excitement.
10. Resolved: I will give two compliments for every criticism. And every criticism will aim to help someone improve, not just belittle or cut down.
11. Resolved: I will enter into family devotions and treat Bible reading and prayer with respect and do my part to help others in the family enjoy them. When I don’t feel spiritually strong, I will pray about this as a personal need rather than pouring it on others as a glass of cold water. I will remember that confessed weakness knit hearts together.
12. Resolved: I will not return evil for evil to try to justify my meannessbecause somebody treated me meanly first.
13. Resolved: I will read my Bible and pray every day, even if it is only a verse and a brief call for help. I know that teens cannot live by bread alone but by every word that comes out of the mouth of God.
14. Resolved: I will come home at the time we agreed on. If something happens to stop me, I will call and explain and ask your guidance.
15. Resolved: I will greet our guests with courtesy and respect and try to make them glad they came.
16. Resolved: I will always tell the truth so that you can trust me and give me more and more freedom as I get older.
17. Resolved: I will pray for you as long as I live, that we will be united in faith and love, not only in this world, but for all of eternity in the kingdom of God.

Any resolutions you would like to add to this list?

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