Parents,

Thanks to all of you who came to the Shepherding Your Child’s Heart seminar on Saturday morning and/or the Green Thumb in Parenting class on Sunday morning! I so respect your love for your kids and your humility in getting help outside yourselves.

In the Green Thumb in Parenting class, we talked about how the metaphor of gardening or farming is useful when we think about parenting. We began this three part series by talking about two introductory steps:

1. Tilling the Soil of Our Children’s Heart: Cultivating Relationship

Here, the point is that God intends to use the relationship teens have with their parents to foster spirital growth in the life of your teen. J.C. Ryle explains:

And all this is one of God’s merciful arrangements. He gives your children a mind that will receive impressions like moist clay. He gives them a disposition at the starting point of life to believe what you tell them, and to take for granted what you advise them, and to trust your word rather than a stranger’s. He gives you, in short, a golden opportunity of doing them good. J.C. Ryle, The Duties of Parents, 7.

We looked at Tedd Tripp’s Authority—Influence Continuum, and how important it is for parents to endeavor to influence teens with godly example and with patient instruction. Practically, this effort is well-served by regular, intentional meetings with your teen. A weekly time with your kid is a good idea, although you have to choose what will work best for your family. These times work best if they are not primarily corrective, and there is plenty of flexibility to address whatever your son or daughter wants to talk about. Two questions that are good to ask every time: “Do you have any questions or observations for me as a dad (or mom)?” and “Is there anything you need to tell me about?”

2. Spreading the Seed of the Gospel: Having Gospel-Centered Conversations

Our teens need the gospel even after salvation. They need to be taught details about God, sin, cross, and faith & repentance. Jerry Bridges explains why this is important:

“Part of the problem is our tendency to give an unbeliever just enough of the gospel to get him or her to pray a prayer to receive Christ. Then we immediately put the gospel on the shelf, so to speak, and go on to the duties of discipleship. As a result, Christians are not instructed in the gospel. And because they do not fully understand the riches and glory of the gospel, they cannot preach it to themselves, or live by it in their daily lives.” Jerry Bridges, The Disciplines of Grace, 46.

Here are five suggestions for making gospel-centered conversations a regular part of your home life:

1. Look for opportunities. Seize them.
2. Walk in personal humility.
3. Orient your kids toward God and His Word.
4. Give affection and encouragement as much as possible.
5. Trust God.

Here’s where I need your help. Session 2 is on Sunday morning (by the way, we’ll be moving to Room 102). We will take the first 15-20 minutes of class to discuss any questions that arose from session 1. Of course you can just show up and ask any question you want, but you’ll get more helpful, more thorough, and more intelligent answers if my panel of experienced parents has a chance to think about it some first. So if you have a question you would like to get answered, leave a comment or email me. These questions will get first priority on Sunday morning.

See you Sunday morning!

Categories: Thursday Thoughts For Parents, five15 blog