Archive for the 'Thursday Thoughts For Parents' category
Parents (and especially fathers of daughters):
 Want to make sure you see Tony Reinke’s post on the Sovereign Grace blog about worldliness. First, an announcement that CJ’s next book is coming soon. Worldliness is a collaboration with Dave Harvey, Bob Kauflin, Jeff Purswell, and Craig Cabaniss. Topics include worldliness, music, media, stuff, modesty, and more. I got to read an advance manuscript and Dads, this is going to be an outstanding discipleship tool, and even though it won’t hit shelves until September, you can pre-order it for 35% off. Go to the Crossway website, click preorder, and use coupon code ‘8SG1′.
Dads of daughters, here is the part for you. CJ recently posted 7 excerpts from the chapter on modesty. As the weather grows warmer, let me encourage you to have your wife use this material with your daughter to review the importance of modesty. Here’s an index of the posts:
There are also outstanding discussion questions listed, and available as a PDF download:
Modesty Discussion Questions
For Your Mind
1) Read 1 Timothy 2:3–10. What do these verses say about the motivation for modest dress?
2) How do we know that 1 Timothy 2:9 does not prohibit women from making themselves beautiful?
3) How do women who dress modestly serve men?
For Your Heart
4) Who are you trying to imitate or identify with through your appearance—godly women, or women of the world?
5) This chapter notes that your wardrobe is a public statement of your personal and private motivation. What does your clothing communicate about your motivations and priorities?
6) Think of a woman who is admired for her godly character and good works. What aspects of her godliness do you particularly want to emulate?
For Your Life
7) What about your wardrobe may need to change so that your appearance can better reflect the transforming power of the gospel?
8. What steps can you take on your next shopping trip to ensure that your clothing purchases reflect humility, modesty, and self-control? (Some ideas: Pray for God’s help and provision in finding modest clothing; check each article of clothing you try on for modesty as well as fit; ask your father, husband, or a trusted friend to evaluate items you’re not sure about.)
9) Mothers, what steps can you take to train your daughters to value godliness over fashion, to nurture humility and self-control, and to wear clothing that reflects these virtues? Fathers, what steps can you take to care for and lead your daughters in humility, self-control, and modesty?
Categories: Discussion Questions, Thursday Thoughts For Parents
No Comments »
Parents, Saturday night, we provided a handout for parents about popular internet filters and monitoring software. In case you weren’t there or lost is, here is the info:
Cybersitter (www.cybersitter.com $40) This service has many features to block websites, emails, IMs online chatting, etc, and also has the ability to scan your hard drive for objectionable material. This product also includes a basic email–filtering feature, although this feature wouldn’t replace a typical spam filtering product. Cybersitter can record both sides of IM sessions, as well as log all sites visited and any violations. This information can then be e-mailed to you in a daily activity report.
Safe Eyes (www.internetsafety.com/safe-eyes/ $50-$55) – A highly rated filter, this service logs websites visited and IM sessions by each user, and you can share your logs with others so they can see what you (as the administrator) are viewing. This product sends alerts via email, text message and telephone calls when someone attempts to access a forbidden website. This is one of the few filters compatible with a Mac, although reviews mention that this product can crash frequently.
Covenant Eyes (www.covenanteyes.com $85/year for one license) – This service monitors and records all web activity and scores all sites according to the maturity of the content. This information is emailed in a report to the accountability partner(s) of your choice.
BSafe (http://www.bsafehome.com/ $50-$70) - This is a highly rated filter which seems to be geared towards helping families. This product includes a time-of-day internet restriction, and filters and logs IM conversations. Like other services, it also offers remote notification and management. This product does not allow users to keep the same profile automatically when installing on multiple computers, so this may create extra work.
Web Watcher (www.webwatcherkids.com/ $97) – This product includes a website monitor and blocker, a chat recorder, key logger, and an automated screenshot capture tool. The product is more oriented towards monitoring than accountability. Currently, the filter software is only available for PCs.
If you have experience with any of these products or advice for other parents, please leave a comment!
Categories: Thursday Thoughts For Parents
1 Comment »
February 28, 2008 5:05 pm
Parents,
Desiring God Ministries recently posted on their blog a very helpful article by John and Noel Piper listing some of the benefits of younger children accompanying parents into the main meeting.
In this article you’ll find:
- The Biggest Stumbling Block
- Togetherness
- Catch the Spirit
- Not an Excessive Expectation
- Not Everything Goes Over Their Heads
- A Sense of Awe
And some practical suggestions from Noel:
- Getting Started
- Preparation All Week Long
- What Happens During Service
- Goals and Requirements
- Creating an Environment in the Pew (!)
- Afterward
- Closeness and Warmth
Read the whole thing: “The Family: Together in God’s Presence“.
Categories: Thursday Thoughts For Parents, five15 blog
3 Comments »
Parents, here are the Rocket Discussion questions, in case you lost your booklet:
MESSAGE 1 DISCUSSION QUESTIONS
- What is a Christian?
- How does a person become a Christian?
- Do you think you are a Christian?
- If yes, why? When did you become a Christian? How confident are you that you will go to heaven when you die?
- If no, what do you think it means to become a Christian? What is keeping you from becoming a Christian?
- What are you living for?
- What do you get most excited about?
- What do you think about in your free time?
- If you had an entire day that was yours to spend however you wanted, what would you do?
- Talk about your obituary.
MESSAGE 2 DISCUSSION QUESTIONS
- What does our world tell us that parents are for?
- What does the Bible tell us that parents are for?
- How am I doing as a dad/mom?
- If you knew for sure that I wouldn’t get angry, is there anything you’d want to tell me about my parenting?
- What are Dad and Mom most passionate about?
- Do I act the same at church as I do when I’m at home? Can you give me some examples?
- Are you aware of my love for you?
- Is there any way I’ve sinned against you that I’ve not repented of?
- Do you have any observations for me?
- Does my relationship with Dad/Mom make you excited to be married?
MESSAGE 3 DISCUSSION QUESTIONS
- What do you get most excited about?
- What do you think I get most excited about?
- What does God get most excited about?
- Describe your level of passion for the church.
- How is God calling you to grow in passion for the church?
- Where is God calling you to serve in the church?
MORE DISCUSSION QUESTIONS FOR LATER ON
- What did you enjoy most about Rocket?
- How did God meet you at Rocket?
- What did you learn?
- Who did you get to know that you didn’t know before?
- What is one way you’ve been encouraged?
- Based on what you heard at Rocket, what is one change you think God is leading you to make in your life?
- What is one step you can take to make that change?
- How can I help you make that change?
- Who can you encourage at church tomorrow for how you saw God’s grace in their life today?
Categories: Discussion Questions, Rocket—08, Thursday Thoughts For Parents
No Comments »
 Parents, if your teens started Mark’s 2008 Bible Reading Plan, they may be starting to wonder what they got themselves into. Before long, they may wonder if a plate of pancakes in 2009 is worth reading two chapters of the Bible every day in 2008. If that’s the case, the following questions are designed to help you talk to them about the spiritual disciplines.
I’ve adapted these from Karl Graustein’s book, Growing Up Christian, p. 212:
- What are the spiritual disciplines? What is the purpose of practicing them?
- What hinders your from regularly practicing the spiritual disciplines. What can you do to overcome these hindrances?
- What is our role in our spiritual growth? What is the Holy Spirit’s role?
- What results do you see in your life for your faithful practice of the spiritual disciplines? And for your lack of practice of them?
- How often should a Christian teenager have a quiet time?
- What should a person do during a quiet time?
If you want to study this topic further with your teen, check out any of the following:
- Chapter 11 of Growing Up Christian, by Karl Graustein
- Living the Cross-Centered Life, by C.J. Mahaney
- Spiritual Disciplines for the Christian Life, by Donald Whitney
- Disciplines of Grace, by Jerry Bridges
Categories: Discussion Questions, Thursday Thoughts For Parents
1 Comment »
Parents, more discussion questions for ya! This time, with a New Year’s flavor. I love Donald Whitney for stuff like this: it’s an article entitled “Questions to Ask for the New Year or on Your Birthday.” Obviously, not all of them apply to your teenager, but tell your teen how you would answer the questions for a valuable teaching and relational opportunity.
- What’s one thing you could do this year to increase your enjoyment of God?
- What’s the most humanly impossible thing you will ask God to do this year?
- What’s the single most important thing you could do to improve the quality of your family life this year?
- In which spiritual discipline do you most want to make progress this year, and what will you do about it?
- What is the single biggest time-waster in your life, and what will you do about it this year?
- What is the most helpful new way you could strengthen your church?
- For whose salvation will you pray most fervently this year?
- What’s the most important way you will, by God’s grace, try to make this year different from last year?
- What one thing could you do to improve your prayer life this year?
- What single thing that you plan to do this year will matter most in ten years? In eternity?In addition to these ten questions, here are twenty-one more to help you “Consider your ways.” Think on the entire list at one sitting, or answer one question each day for a month.
- What’s the most important decision you need to make this year?
- What area of your life most needs simplifying, and what’s one way you could simplify in that area?
- What’s the most important need you feel burdened to meet this year?
- What habit would you most like to establish this year?
- Who do you most want to encourage this year?
- What is your most important financial goal this year, and what is the most important step you can take toward achieving it?
- What’s the single most important thing you could do to improve the quality of your work life this year?
- What’s one new way you could be a blessing to your pastor (or to another who ministers to you) this year?
- What’s one thing you could do this year to enrich the spiritual legacy you will leave to your children and grandchildren?
- What book, in addition to the Bible, do you most want to read this year?
- What one thing do you most regret about last year, and what will you do about it this year?
- What single blessing from God do you want to seek most earnestly this year?
- In what area of your life do you most need growth, and what will you do about it this?
- What’s the most important trip you want to take this year?
- What skill do you most want to learn or improve this year?
- To what need or ministry will you try to give an unprecedented amount this year?
- What’s the single most important thing you could do to improve the quality of your commute this year?
- What one biblical doctrine do you most want to understand better this year, and what will you do about it?
- If those who know you best gave you one piece of advice, what would they say? Would they be right? What will you do about it?
- What’s the most important new item you want to buy this year?
- In what area of your life do you most need change, and what will you do about it this year?
Categories: Discussion Questions, Thursday Thoughts For Parents
1 Comment »
December 20, 2007 12:37 pm
Parents, I want to continue to provide you with some good questions for discussion, today with a Christmas flavor. Again, I’m doing this because we often hear parents say that they want to spend time having meaningful conversations with their kids, but don’t always know what to ask. Here are some questions to ask as you wrap presents together or search in vain for a parking place at the mall:
- What is Christmas about? (Yes, it’s about Jesus, but why is that important?)
- Why did God become man?
- What is the most meaningful part of the Christmas story to you?
- What is your fondest Christmas memory?
- What is your favorite Christmas tradition?
- What gift are you most hoping to get this year?
- What gift are you most excited about giving this year?
- Why do we give Christmas gifts, anyway?
- Name one person you know who doesn’t understand the true meaning of Christmas. How can you preach the gospel to that person this season?
Categories: Discussion Questions, Thursday Thoughts For Parents
No Comments »
December 13, 2007 10:10 am
In case you couldn’t write fast enough to catch that J.C. Ryle quotation that Mark read on Sunday:
“Parents, I beseech you, for your children’s sake, beware of over-indulgence. I call on you to remember, it is your first duty to consult their real interests, and not their fancies and likings;–to train them, not to humour them;–to profit, not merely to please.
“You must not give way to every wish and caprice of your child’s mind, however much you may love him. You must not let him suppose his will is to be everything, and that he has only to desire a thing and it will be done. Do not, I pray you, make your children idols, lest God should take them away, and break your idol, just to convince you of your folly.
“Learn to say “No” to your children. Show them that you are able to refuse whatever you think is not fit for them. Show them that you are ready to punish disobedience, and that when you speak of punishment, you are not only ready to threaten, but also to perform. Do no threaten too much. Threatened folks, and threatened faults, live long. Punish seldom, but really and in good earnest,–frequent and slight punishment is a wretched system indeed
“Reader, if there be any point which deserves your attention, believe me, it is this one. It is one that will give you trouble, I know. But if you do not take trouble with your children when they are young, they will give you trouble when they are old. Choose which you prefer.” J.C. Ryle, The Duties of Parents
Categories: Thursday Thoughts For Parents
No Comments »
Parents, I want to continue with the discussion questions that I began posting a couple Thursdays ago. Mark’s message on Sunday about David and Absalom and the lessons we learn and can apply in parenting are a good starting point for a list of questions today.
These questions are adapted from a seminar by Steve Shank entitled “Fathers and Sons” from the 2005 Sovereign Grace Ministries Leaders Conference. You can download it for free if you like.
- Do you have a divine perspective of your own salvation?
- Do you have a divine perspective of your children?
- Are you more aware of the prior activity of God in your children’s lives than the present deficiencies?
- When you correct, are the kids first aware of your love and affection for them? Ask your children about this!
- Do you ever lost track of what God has done in your children – the amount of growth that has taken place?
- What are areas that you have seen real change? When was the last time you communicated it to your child?
- Have there been any big changes you have not acknowledged thanks to God for His grace or appreciation for your child’s response to the grace of God? Ask your children about these questions and see if they have any other perspective.
- Are you going after the sin in your own heart and allowing your children to see that you are on the same road? What was the last sin you confessed to your children? Are you consistent in confession and asking forgiveness from your children when you offend them? Are there any unresolved issues or sins?
- Have you ever seen a change take place and then begin to focus solely on the next thing that needs to change or an area of growth? How would you respond to similar treatment by a spouse or friend?
- Can you receive correction humbly from your children? Do they know your faults and sin?
- Do your children feel your gratitude to God for them? Ask them to evaluate you. How do you do at expressing thanksgiving (it is different than simply feeling grateful).
- Do they think you are “on their side” – you are trying to help them and can relate to the struggle with sin they experience as a fellow sinner? Are you more aware of evidences of grace or areas needing growth?
- Have you imposed a timetable for growth and change? Do any areas come to mind? Can you see change when it happens? Are you looking for it?
Categories: Discussion Questions, Thursday Thoughts For Parents
No Comments »
December 6, 2007 11:41 am
Parents, in light of our Push Back series of messages, and especially in view of Saturday’s message on Media, I thought it would be helpful to provide some discussion questions for you on the topic of culture, movies, music, and TV.
This is a substantial list, so choose wisely and go slow. Let me know if there have been other questions that have been useful to you in this regard.
- What difference should the gospel make for your media choices? What difference does the gospel make for your media choices?
- In what ways are your media choices conformed to the world?
- What does it mean to be transformed?
- Do you have a process for evaluating movies, TV, and music? What is it?
- Think about the last couple movies you watched. Did those movies promote an evil message? Did they use an evil method?
- What changes is God calling you to make with your media choices?
(The following questions are adapted from Karl Graustein, Growing Up Christian, pp. 69, 75.)
- What are your favorite TV shows, movies, and bands?
- What values do they promote?
- How do their values compare to the Word of God?
- Do you critically evaluate TV shows or music CDs? How?
- Is there anything you refuse to watch or listen to? Why?
- Do you think your entertainment habits please God?
- What is wrong with loving the world?
- Why is hiding your love for the world from your parents a dangerous sign?
- What are the key ways you are influenced by the world? How do music, TV, movies, and friendship influence you?
- How effectively do you evaluate television, movies, music, the Internet, and friendships?
- What is one way you can love the world less in the next month?
- What is one way you can love God more in the next month?
- How can your parents, pastor, and friends help you in loving the world less and loving God more?
Categories: Discussion Questions, Push Back, Thursday Thoughts For Parents
No Comments »
|
Want to make sure you see Tony Reinke’s post on the Sovereign Grace blog about worldliness. First, an announcement that CJ’s next book is coming soon. Worldliness is a collaboration with Dave Harvey, Bob Kauflin, Jeff Purswell, and Craig Cabaniss. Topics include worldliness, music, media, stuff, modesty, and more. I got to read an advance manuscript and Dads, this is going to be an outstanding discipleship tool, and even though it won’t hit shelves until September, you can pre-order it for 35% off. Go to the Crossway website, click preorder, and use coupon code ‘8SG1′.
